Surprising Amount In Common

20250501

Prompt from DailyPrompt.com

We leaned up against the wall, and I had no idea what was coming next. My brother’d said there was someone he wanted me to meet but wouldn’t tell me anything more. And he was being fidgety.
So there we were, in a random alley, trying hard to look cool, and waiting for some mysterious meet.
I was thinking ‘Has the loser finally gotten a girlfriend?? No way.’
Yeah. No way.
There’s this soft lil clip-clopping and a… piglet? Squeezed through a hole in the fence. It stopped and peered up at me.
“Hey, Wilber.” My brother’s trying so hard to sound chill but was clearly nervous. “This is my sister Mary. Mary, um, this is Wilber. She’s the person who-”
“She?” Also person, but that’s even more awkward to ask about right in front of it.
My brother looked abashed. “I, um, she asked for a name, and I thought she was a guy, so…”
“You gotta be kidding me.”
“No joke.” Wilber spoke up. Her voice was low and grumbly. I could see why my dumbass brother assumed she’s a guy. Plus ‘Wilber’ is probably the only pig name he could think of. “It’s cool.”
“Why not just give her a girl’s name?”
“We’d already put it on the rent agreement and everything.” Wilber waggled her shoulders in what I assumed was a shrug. “Changing it would be a real hassle. And who cares?”
“Rent. Agreement.” I shot a glance at my brother.
“Yup.” Wilber bobbed her head. “Davy was my signatory for a kennel downtown. Great guy. He’s told me all about you.”
“…K.”
“And, uh, Wilber’s boss has been giving her trouble.” My brother said, as if this was a perfectly normal conversation. “And since you’ve had to deal with that kinda stuff, I thought maybe you could, I dunno, give her advice?”
I squinted down at Wilber. “You have a job?”
“Uh, duuuh?” Wilber squinted back up at me. “How’d you think I’m paying rent?”
“…How old are you?”
“Three years, five months. And yes, that’s an adult. I’m a mini breed, ok?”
“Mkay?” I didn’t know how to handle this conversation. “And you work at…?”
“Community garden.”
My brother piped up. “You know the place off Peach and Third?”
“The one run by that old bag?” I pulled a face. Then stuff clicked. “Waaaait. She’s your boss? Ms, whatsit, Kings?”
“Yeah.” Turns out pigs can curl their lips to an impressive degree. “Ms ‘Call me Shannon, sweetie’.”
“Oh my god.” That phrase gave me flashbacks to the time that witch insisted on running the summer fair.
That’s it. This pig and me are now sworn besties and this is war.
“Hey, Davy.” I punched my brother’s arm. “Where around here will serve talking animals?” I cringed. “Ah, I mean-”
Wilber snickered. I am 100% sure that’s what it was. “Relax, I know what you meant! And the freezy parlour is great.”
“Alright.” I straightened up and flipped my hair. “Let’s go. Real talk time.”

Prompt was the first sentence.