When The Laws Of Hospitality Are Binding

20260724

Prompt from Eiiri’s Prompt Foundry, “Pride 2 Disability Boogaloo”.

At first crossing the boarder into the Fey Realm was much the same as any other legal boundary. Until Imogen was pulled over and questioned about the contents of her second suitcase.
“I have allergies.”
The fey officer scrutinised her, expressionless, then eyed the case packed full of snack bars and instant noodles. “That does not explain why you are attempting to carry this much mortal food. Were you contacted by a reseller?”
“What? No. This is all for me. I’m here for the legal conference and I have multiple food allergies.”
Now they displayed an expression - a frown. “You are boarding here?”
“Yes.” Imogen said slowly. Keeping her voice painfully polite. “For the legal conference.”
“Then why are you carrying mortal food? Much in such quantities. All food served to guests of the realm is guaranteed safe to eat, including being free of magical compulsion or influence.”
“Because I can’t eat things most people can.” Imogen managed to keep her smiled fixed, but was now speaking through gritted teeth.
“Please bear with.” They turned away, brow furrowing. Some kind of communication?
Imogen rubbed her forehead and took slow, hopefully calming breaths. Trying not to panic about what she was going to do, if they wouldn’t let her bring food across the boarder. Surely they must have encountered this problem before??
Another fey strode up, this one dressed in what seemed to be a kitchen uniform. “You are here for the conference?”
“Yes. Imogen Fisher. I filled out-”
“Ah, yes. You are allergic to nuts, dairy, and nightshades. What is the issue, then? Why are you refusing our hospitality?”
Imogen stared blankly between the two unhelpfully stony faces. Utterly lost as to what the problem was. “W-well, if I eat anything that contains any of those ingredients I get sick.”
“Which is why none of the food being served contains those ingredients.”
Despite the words being spoken slowly, as if to a child, it took several seconds for Imogen to wrap her head around them.
She blinked rapidly, her mouth twitching, then stammered “What? Nothing? None of them??”
“You are a guest.” The chef said, as if this not only explained everything, it made her behaviour utterly asinine. “All food being served at the conference is safe for you to eat.”
“Everything???”
The fey exchanged a long look she couldn’t read.
Turning back to her, the chef asked “Do humans not suffer consequences if they fail to provide for a guest?”
“Er… noooo?” Imogen mumbled. “Well, I mean, sometimes complaining? I suppose?”
“But… no cosmic retribution?”
“Oh. No.”
“Ahh.” The chef’s nose wrinkled. Their expression baffled and disdainful and faintly pitying. They patted her arm and kindly said “Well, you are in a far more civilised realm now. And please rest assured that I have no intention of voiding my immortality. You may safely eat anything from my kitchen.”
“I… um… thank you.” Imogen managed.
Voiding immortality??
The security guard said “That being the case, would you be willing to leave this mortal food in storage and collect it on your way out? If not, I’ll have to arrange a writ and have you swear a magically binding oath that you aren’t going to be selling or distributing any of it. Some of these substances can be quite dangerous, you see.”
“Oh, no, that…” Imogen bemusedly glanced over the very boring self-stable food. Well, boring for a human! “If you’ve gone to all the trouble of making food I can eat, I’m happy to try it! Though, um, is it alright if I take a few of the snack bars? Just for convenience?”
The security guard gingerly picked one up and inspected the ingredients list with great care, then said “I believe three of these would fall below the level for ‘transporting mortal food’ regulations. Would that be enough?”
“Oh, yes, one a day is fine! It’s just for in case.” Imogen took three bars and stuffed them in her other luggage.
“Let me write you a receipt for the rest.”
That seemed a little silly, but if ‘mortal food’ was such a cause for concern, it would probably be more hassle for them to dispose of it than to keep it for the weekend for her! And besides, no point wasting food. So Imogen simply nodded.
As the security guard started scribbling, the chef bowed and said “The full list of dishes available is in the conference package. If there are any instances where you don’t see at least one option you would enjoy, notify any member of staff.”
“I - thank you.”
Normally Imogen would say that she didn’t want to be a bother, but with that comment about “cosmic retribution” and “voiding immortality” hanging over her, she was suddenly faced with the concern that not being a demanding guest might do dreadful things to her host! What a peculiar way round for things to be.
People really hadn’t been kidding, when they said the Fey Realms were a whole different world…

Prompt was “Allergy”.